Spatula and Trident: Reimu Burger's New Employee
by ChimeraHoujuu
Summary: A little something I thought of whenever I see Walfas videos with the Reimu Burger background. People say I'm cruel to my OC, and.. ..to tell the truth, I might be. Rated M for now, just for future language, possible violence, and some suggestive themes that comes in later chapters. Much later chapters, I might add. NuexOC pairing. Saikou and Seiken are the only OCs that are mine.
1. Introduction

Hello, everyone! ChimeraHoujuu here, starting up a new series. I'm quitting on my old one for now, and I hope this one is a lot better than the other story. Anyways, if you like this story, don't forget to review. I will upload at random times, but they shouldn't be too far in between.  
Hope to see you next chapter!

~ChimeraHoujuu

* * *

It was a cold, yet exiting day in the winter of Gensokyo. A black haired man with dark clothes walked out of the gate of the Scarlet Devil Mansion, where he was once a worker. He took a deep breath.  
"Great, I got fired," muttered the unfortunate man. Saikou Kimitsu is his name, and he wasn't hesitant to share it. He sighed, looking around and starting to go on the path. He took a few steps, only to realize that his vision went into a complete black!  
"Hey! What's the big deal here?!" he shrieked. No one heard him at all.

_||Girls are kidnapping the mercenary. Please wait warmly until they are ready.||_

A long hour had passed, and Saikou was ready to give up before regaining his vision, coming out of a sack to find a restaurant.

_Grand Opening! Reimu Burger_

"Great. I'm trapped in another loophole. So who is the-" He was suddenly looking at the Hakurei Shrine Maiden, Reimu Hakurei, and an amulet was stabbed into him. He growled in pain, but was promptly knocked out by a strange force inside of the amulet.  
"_Youkai you were, Youkai you won't be, not when you work_," muttered Reimu as she went into her shrine.

**||Introduction Theme: "Tsuki Ni Murakumo, Hana ni Kaze", from Memories of Phantasm||**

_Spatula and Trident: Reimu Burger's New Employee!_


	2. A Strange Start

Hello everyone! New chapter today, and I'm starting to plan on how I upload this. When this story keeps getting views on the latest chapter, I'll plan on making new chapters. And hey, I don't make money out of this, this is what I do for fun.  
Hope you enjoy!

~ChimeraHoujuu

* * *

Early morning rose, and it was a normal day in the Forest of Magic. Not so far from it, a small shop was open.

_Mike's Weapon Shop_

Someone walked in afterward, and it was revealed to be Saikou. The mercenary walked in, seeing a man named Mike Douglas.

"Ah, Saikou. I was just working on a trident," noted Mike.

"Whatever. Anyways, you have any spatulas?"

"They're at the last one, along with other kitchen tools."

"Thanks." Saikou went over with a nod, and a black haired girl walked in.

"Ah," Mike started, "You're the chimera from the UFO incident, right?"

"Yeah, Nue Houjuu. I wanted to see wha-" she paused, seeing Saikou start walking to Mike, and paid a strange amount of attention to the trident across Saikou's back. She even took the time to look at the merc himself. However, he paid for his spatula quickly, took one look at Nue, and left the scene.

"How strange.. I thought.. hmm.." Nue now flew out of the weapon shop, leaving Mike alone.

"Seems like sis has competition for her food supply," muttered Mike.

_Two minutes later, at Reimu Burger.._

Saikou flipped the sign from "Closed" to "Open", sighing and going into the kitchen while Reimu teleported in. She took her stand behind the cash register, and silently waited.

Nue walked in, yet no one saw her, had she manipulated the Spy's abilities to be invisible. Perfect, she thought. I can get food easily! Soon, she was at the kitchen, seeing no one and sighing in relief. She started to appear, looking around and still seeing nothing, before hearing a screeching sound, like someone was sliding harshly on the ground. The chimera turned around, only to fall from a heavy weight. Right when she was hit, her eyes failed to get anything, closed off.  
She groaned in pain, in sync with the weight on her, and started to see what fell on her. Her face went pure red, and she saw the face of Saikou Kimitsu, the trident wielder she saw before.

"Ahh!" she shrieked, backing away from the mercenary with her face still red.

"Oh, it's you. Weren't you the girl that was looking at me back at Mike's shop?"

"Uh, yeah.. A-ah, where are my manners?!" She got up, changing the subject. "I'm Nue, Nue Houjuu.."

"Saikou Kimitsu, chef of the Reimu Burger," the merc responded.

"Hey! Saikou! We have visitors!" The timing Reimu had was perfect, since both of them wanted to forget that one just landed on the other.

"Well, sorry, Nue, I have to get to work," Saikou stated.

"May I watch?"

He nodded, and she started to hide, watching Saikou start at his work.


	3. Operation Darkness

Sorry about the large spacing between paragraphs. I fixed a little bit at the end, but I got too lazy.. Sorry about that. Anyways, chapter 3, and an introduction to the love triangle. It's slight, but you'll see it. Enjoy!

* * *

"Saikou, Fairies at 9 o' clock!" announced Reimu.

"Great. Just.. great," murmured the merc in response.

Saikou came out of the kitchen, walking out of the door and glaring at the fairies.

"You all are bad business, you know. All eat and no pay. I gotta take care of that." He pulled out his trident, swinging it for a while before putting it away, somewhat making it easier to yank out.

Nue stared in amazement, seeing the mercenary juggle several fairies in the sky with bullets, blades, and his trident. Almost like he was juggling balls in a circus. She stared in even more amazement, seeing a dark laser sweep them away with no effect on most of the environment.

"That'll teach them how to pay when they eat," he grumbled, walking back in and looking at Nue. He could've sworn that her pupils were shaped like hearts, but shook it off and went back to cooking.

A blonde Youkai with a black skirt, a formal black shirt, and a white undershirt walked in, following the scent of our favorite mercenary.

"Saikou! Operation 'Darkness'!" shouted Reimu, warily.

With this, Saikou aimed into the air, shooting at a white dot in the ceiling. It bounced off, and several pre-placed ingredients went into a tray. He closed his eyes, and grunted a bit, feeling a finger come off. It rejuvenated slowly, but he still felt pain.

"Don't worry, Nue. My fingers aren't that precious to me."

Now he walked out with the tray, serving it to Rumia. "Your usual, Rumia."

"Ah, why thank you. Saving the contraption for me, I assume?" flirted the dark Youkai.

"Just as flimsy as ever. You never change, unlike me. I gave up on the jokes.."

Saikou walked back into the kitchen, not turning back to look at Rumia but strangely smiling.

"That was the shop guy's sister. His name is Mike Douglas. Her name's Rumia," he muttered.

"Does she know you?" Nue asked.

"Yeah, I'm food supply."

"Food supply?! I thought you had something better than to be a walking lunchbox!"

"Well, turns out I am." Saikou quickly changed the subject. "Wanna know how to aim for this thing? I have a test run without the blade aiming for your finger."

Nue smiled, nodding in agreement.

_Mercenary's Training: Operation Darkness_

"I can do this without looking, but here, I'll set a patty down so it cooks. Keep one arm on the spatula, and one arm on the gun."  
Nue was nervous, learning something like this for the first time.  
"It's okay," Saikou broke the fourth wall. Dammit, now I've gotta fix it.. "It's your first time, so I won't be harsh on you."

The chimera blushed, suddenly becoming a little overcome with willpower, and shot the bullet at the white mark. It bounced off the ceiling, slapping lettuce and tomatoes into the bun. When Saikou shouted "flip it", Nue flipped the patty while the bullet kept flying. Several fries fell onto the tray, into the box, just as Saikou made it into. "Patty!" screamed Saikou, as Nue flipped the cooked patty onto the bun while everything else fell towards the chimera. Now Saikou pulled Nue out of the way, as the bullet finished flight, putting the condiments on. Finally, the top bun fell, and Operation Darkness was finished.

"How do you.. huff.. plan all of this.. puff.. in one day?" Nue was struck by awe.  
"Torture. Figuratively speaking. You don't get this skill in one day. No, no, no. You get it in several weeks before you plan it out and try to be lazy."  
"How much bullets did you use?"  
"Basically, a whole Revolver's worth. Reloads and all. And I use a handgun."  
"You know.. I won't mind if I worked with you.."  
"Well, if you really want to work with me, you have to know me, first."

Nue blushed, and attempted to shake it off. Knowing a man inside out.. a man, and someone she thought of more than a friend. It was unusual for a prankster like her to change like this.

"Talk to Reimu. Her dress is as red as your face. If she says no, then there's nothing else I can do."

"Okay.."

Nue slowly walked over to the Shrine Maiden of Paradise.

"Hey, uh, Reimu Hakurei, right?"

"Yeah, that's me," said the cashier miko. "You wanted something?"

"Would you mind if I worked here?"

Silence.

"..Reimu?"

..More silence.

"Hello? Miko?"

..Does this silence bore you now? Cause it bores me a bit.

"Stop stalling!" Nue shouted, towards me.

Alright, fine, I'll keep telling you what happened:  
Reimu would suddenly shriek in surprise, staring with wide eyes at Nue.  
"You?! Want to work?!"  
"Is it that strange?" Nue whined.  
"You're supposed to be a prankster, not some honorable lady asking for work!"  
"People change, don't they?"


End file.
